Carry On
by BrilliantDarkness
Summary: Long strides or baby steps. With conviction or on a whim. When life has left us reeling, the important thing is finding a way to carry on.


_I don't roam these streets  
I am not the ghost you want of me_

The sound of the scissors through her previously long hair tore at her heart. She was doing this for them but would they even know her when she finally made it back? And who did she think she was fooling…this was as much for herself as for anyone else.

Looking in the dirty glass serving as a mirror for her, she felt bolder. No one would ever hurt her again. They'd all be safe in time but she would be safe right now.

* * *

_And we talked and talked  
About how our parents will die_

Pulling his coat against the cold, he wondered how he had ended up so alone. Things had been good once. His folks were good, loving people. But they were gone now and he and his siblings had scattered.

He raked a hand through his flaxen hair and thought about tomorrow. Tomorrow he'd see what that town up ahead had for him. Maybe a day or two of work. It was less about the money than the chance to be around people. A conversation, a lively story, a joke, a shared laugh. He longed so for these things.

Hell, maybe tomorrow he'd even find where he belonged. Exciting enough to hold his fleeting interests and solid enough to give him the home he didn't realize he would miss so much.

* * *

_Your head in the curtains  
And heart like the fourth of July_

It was such an impulsive thing to do. But it felt right. Walking all this way. Aimless. He had been aimless. But when he saw her, he had aim, a goal. He had something that made sense to him. Nothing had made sense in so very long.

She felt it too, he thought. The feeling that they were bound together now. Their fates tied inextricably together in whatever the future held for them.

He still didn't know where he was going or what he might find when he got there. Straightening his hat over his light brown curls, he set his deep blue eyes on the horizon and headed toward whatever it might be.

* * *

_So I met up with some friends  
At the edge of the night_

The cruel words still echoed around them as they stared dejectedly into the flames of their campfire. Another ill-fated day of looking for work. Another day filled with cruelty—toward both of them. Each had thought at one time or another that the young man across the fire would be better off if they went their separate ways.

They could never bring themselves to part, though. Outcasts. Unwanted. Freaks. They knew what they were every time they looked in a mirror. But, somehow, when they were together they could forget that fact. They could feel proud. They could hold their heads up.

But they couldn't eat friendship and pride didn't shield them from the elements.

* * *

_You swore and said  
We are not shining stars_

The last time, he swore. The last time he would let someone use him like that. The last time he would fall for it. His golden eyes glared into the growing darkness.

He thought at one time that he was smarter, tougher. He knew he killed an innocent man as sure as if he'd pulled the trigger. And he swore then he wouldn't be duped like that again.

And then it happened again. Not this time though. He just wasn't going to trust anyone. Not ever. Not again. He wasn't a toy or a tool for the use of others anymore. He was a man. His own man. If anyone was going to be used, he'd do the using. He had the skills now to make people respect him…fear him even.

It would all be different now, he thought as he patted the cold steel in the holster at his side.

* * *

_Though I've never been through hell like that  
I've closed enough windows  
To know you can never look back_

It was time. It was past time. Too long ago she had patted the dirt down over the tiny grave. Grass now covered it with a few flowers as well.

If only her heart could have been so quickly covered with life and beauty. But there it sat, heavy in her chest and gaping its ugly wound at the world.

She'd hidden herself away at first. She'd secluded herself. That didn't bring him back.

So then she'd gone through the motions of normal. There was one who wanted to get close. She thought maybe his intentions were even honest. She just couldn't.

She gave him accusing glances but the blame was hers. She pushed him away even though she knew away was not where he wanted to go. Even still he didn't want to go away.

But it was time now. It was time to place one foot in front of the other one. It was time to take a step toward living. God didn't want her yet.

* * *

_If you're lost and alone_

Lonely and tired. That was all there was. Not even a day's worth of work in this sorry excuse for a town. He sighed in near despair and prepared to move along until his pale blue eyes happened on the notice.

* * *

_Or you're sinking like a stone_

He still mulled over where he could go where he wouldn't be the used. Then he saw it. The poster. Something sparked in him. He asked a passing young lady to read it to him.

* * *

_Carry on_

They were growing weary. Perhaps going where there were no others would—but then their eyes happened on the posting at the same time. They turned each to the other and smiled.

* * *

_May your past be the sound_

She straightened the glasses that she hoped covered her feminine features and set out. She reminded herself over and over that no one saw the frightened girl anymore. Still she feared not being able to make it. But then…there it was…the answer.

* * *

_Of your feet upon the ground_

The poster might as well have had his picture on it. It was him…his fate…his fate and hers.

* * *

_Carry on_

Signing the papers felt good. Some thought she was crazy but she knew. She just knew that this was the sanest thing she'd done in a very long time.

* * *

_It's nice to know  
When I was left for dead  
I was found_

This was the place. It suddenly felt to Kid that his life was about to begin in earnest. Whatever this place held, this was the first step in being the man he was meant to be.

* * *

_My legs are fine  
'Cause after all they are mine_

She looked at the small homestead. The others looked scary at first. But on closer inspection they were just as young and scared as she was. Lou thought she just might be alright now.

* * *

_Show me how  
No one's ever gonna stop us now_

They gave each other one last look of strength before heading toward the fence. The man at the office hadn't cared that Ike couldn't talk. Even less note was given to Buck's skin. This was it. This was their chance to fit somewhere, maybe. If not then they still fit with each other. As brothers.

* * *

'_Cause we are  
We are shining stars_

He strode into the yard carrying his Hawken like he owned the place. It was the bluster that covered how scared and lonely he felt sometimes. He knew though. Inside himself he knew there was something special. His mama said so. Maybe this was the place for William F. Cody to find his inner hero.

* * *

_We are invincible  
We are who we are_

He adjusted the Colt low on his hip so it rested more against his upper thigh. It was the look that mattered most. The intimidation. He learned about that. From Dobbins. From the Judge. He knew that looking like you could hurt someone was as good as hurting them. Better even because you didn't have to actually hurt anyone.

This place didn't look so bad, Jimmy thought. The lady seemed nice enough. He wasn't going to give over to it easy though. He'd make sure they all knew he was no one to be trifled with. He wasn't here to make friends.

* * *

_On our darkest day  
When we're miles away  
So we'll come  
We'll find our way home_

Emma looked out from her porch to the young men assembled at the fence waiting for Mr. Spoon. She didn't realize they were sending her boys, children really. Well, that one was a girl, sure as she was standing there. That was of no matter to Emma though.

These children…they needed looking after. They needed caring for. She could actually feel the open wound in her heart closing around them, holding them inside.

_Carry on_

* * *

**Thank you Myrtle for taking half a good idea and showing me how to make it all of a good idea! You are the best, my dear!-J**

* * *

Carry On – fun. (Bhasker, Jeff/Dost, Andrew/Antonoff, Jack/Ruess, Nate)

Carry on  
Well I woke up to the sound of silence  
The cars were cutting like knives in a fist fight  
And I found you with a bottle of wine  
Your head in the curtains  
And heart like the fourth of July

You swore and said  
We are not  
We are not shining stars  
This I know  
I never said we are

Though I've never been through hell like that  
I've closed enough windows  
To know you can never look back

If you're lost and alone  
Or you're sinking like a stone  
Carry on  
May your past be the sound  
Of your feet upon the ground  
Carry on

Carry on, carry on

So I met up with some friends  
At the edge of the night  
At a bar off 75  
And we talked and talked  
About how our parents will die  
All our neighbours and wives

But I like to think  
I can cheat it all  
To make up for the times I've been cheated on  
And it's nice to know  
When I was left for dead  
I was found and now I don't roam these streets  
I am not the ghost you want of me

If you're lost and alone  
Or you're sinking like a stone  
Carry on  
May your past be the sound  
Of your feet upon the ground  
Carry on

Woah  
My head is on fire  
But my legs are fine  
Cause after all they are mine  
Lay your clothes down on the floor  
Close the door  
Hold the phone  
Show me how  
No one's ever gonna stop us now

Cause we are  
We are shining stars  
We are invincible  
We are who we are  
On our darkest day  
When we're miles away  
So we'll come  
We will find our way home

If you're lost and alone  
Or you're sinking like a stone  
Carry on  
May your past be the sound  
Of your feet upon the ground  
Carry on

Carry on, carry on


End file.
